Download 2011

Yes, it's the obligatory festival review! I hadn't actually planned on going to Download but got offered a ticket at the last minute (thanks Lou!) so headed on up. As is tradition, Regan boarded a plane to France so as to maintain a rock equilibrium in the Midlands. Due to lack of planning I only set off after work on Friday, hence had already missed most of the awesome bands that were scheduled. Luckily 2 nights before I'd seen The Darkness in Shepherd's Bush so all was not lost. The plan was to arrive in time for Def Leppard's headlining slot. Then 20 minutes before they were due to being, this happened:


So we did the sensible thing and absconded to dry old Beeston for a few Harvest Pales with R-Man and T-Fran. I'd caught Def Lep a couple of years ago so it wasn't too much of a shame to miss them and stay dry for a night, especially since we'd have missed half the set by the time we arrived anyway.

So clean and dry, Saturday kicked off with Rise to Remain. I'm not down with the kidz enough to know anything about them but there was some satisfactory widdling involved. I'm a sucker for bands that look scary, so Ghost were good to look at but unfortunately the mix in the tent didn't let me find out if they were actually any good. So a giant Yorkshire pudding later, we headed over to check out Royal Republic's acoustic set. Sadly by the time we found the Jagermeister tent (secreted down a hidden pathway) we'd missed most of their set. I'm going to go ahead and recommend you watch their excellent Shazam session, even though Great Men have been shunned by the Shazamers now.


Skunk Anansie are always good, but chose a very poor setlist for a festival slot: far too much new material. Cheap Trick were very accomplished for "a brand new band from the United States"... And I was pleasantly surprised by Avenged Sevenfold, they put on a top notch show on the main stage.

At this point I was faced with a tough call. On the main stage was System of a Down, the very first band I ever saw at Rock City. But on the second stage was Alice Cooper, who is guaranteed to put a massive smile on my face. I got in position for Alice and was not disappointed. My advice to you, dear reader, is not to make my mistake of nearly not watching Alice Cooper. Always watch Alice Cooper. There was an especially great vibe in the crowd as clearly most people had never seen Alice before and were totally blown away. A python, 20 foot monster and guillotine, not to mention riffs and solos galore, later, grins and a buzz of excitement abound. I then managed to catch the last 40 minutes of System of a Down, who were excellent (on a sub-Alice plane of course), and as my friend pointed out, probably mentally ill.



The rain held off all night, but just as we contemplated leaving the tent at 10am, the heavens opened. And stayed open. We braved the elements for a cheeseburger and watch Sworn Amongst, who satisfied the 3 main requirements of metal:

1. Riffs
2. Solos
3. Growling silly things. (example lyric: "Die! Die! Die! ... we f**k the system every day"

We then had the misfortune to witness My Darkest Days (apt name), who must have taken a wrong turn on the way to the X Factor auditions. They were so bad that we decided to just leave the whole festival immediately.

Download 2010

Yes, just like thousands of other blogs this week I'm going to give you my lowdown of this year's Download festival at Donington Park.

Armed with R-Man's army boots, my GNR denim (style reference: Bill Murray in Caddyshack meets Don Dokken) and a crate of beers, I rocked up on Friday afternoon with my rock brothers Robin and Edd. I was pretty smug because Jen had already arrived and set up a tent for me: a lovely number with pink flowers on it. It wasn't long before we met an Australian girl who could write our names in Elvish (obviously it was only one particular form of Elvish but unfortunately I'm not educated in these ways).

Then some Norwegians turned up and told us they were worried that AC/DC weren't playing because they weren't on the list for the main stage. Upon arriving at the arena it became clear that this was because the main stage was too tiny for them and they'd brought their own. Needless to say what ensued was 2 hours of full blown awesomeness. For Christmas I would like an elevating platform on which I intend to play all future solos please. Thanks.

After a cold night (my first festival camping experience would you believe!) we had a solid day of boozing before getting to the arena for Megadeth. As soon as I saw the Rust In Peace themed backdrop and drum skins, I knew we were in for another Mustaine treat. Sure enough amongst others they played all my essential tracks: Holy Wars, Hangar 18, Tornado of Souls, Symphony of Destruction, Sweating Bullets and Peace Sells. The only way I could possibly follow that was with half a roast chicken and chips. Unfortunately the chicken stall had a 20 minute wait on chicken! IT'S ALL THEY SELL!! To be fair it's not like many people go to festivals, I can see why they were surprised by the rush. Incidentally, Rush would have been a surprise, but true to the schedule next up was Deftones followed by Rage Against The Machine.

I've not listened to Rage since I was a youth in baggy jeans. Now I'm a 26 year-old in baggy jeans, but within seconds of them starting I felt 12 years younger. I lost my homeys instantly but fortunately Edd had upped the style ante earlier in the day and purchased a sweet hat which enabled me to pick him out of a crowd at 20 paces. Who owned the show more, Rage or Edd's hat? Too close to call.

After an evening of gourmet festival food and a sexy party in our tent, with special guest appearance from Jack 2D4, Sunday rolled round with probably my most highly anticipated lineup. First off though, it was time for half a roast chicken and chips. Unfortunately the chicken stall had a 30 minute wait on chicken! IT'S ALL THEY SELL!! Their loss, I had my second giant Yorkshire pudding of the weekend and it did not disappoint. Some people will tell you it's like eating the plate. It's not. But it is delicious.

Since I was about 7 years old Slash has been a hero of mine,; there's no doubt that his Les Pauls fascinated me enough to get into playing guitar. And finally here he was! The years may have had some impact on his body (nobody needed to see Slash's sideboob) but he was still every bit the hero. Myles Kennedy wailed the hell out of several of his solo tracks as well as 4 whole cuts from Appetite, and a hoped-for cameo from Lemmy was everything I dreamed of. I couldn't speak for about an hour afterwards.

Which incidentally is when the heavens opened. (Sweet segue there hey?) Billy Idol was the first act to have to compete with the weather, but fortunately he pulled it out of the bag with every classic song and arguably (yes Robin you can argue anything) the best working of the crowd all weekend. White Wedding, Flesh For Fantasy, Eyes Without A Face, Rebel Yell - all present and correct.

After being pleasantly surprised by both Porcupine Tree and Steel Panther on the second stage, we dragged our sorry wet cold asses back to the main stage for Stone Temple Pilots, who were really cool, and then of course Aerosmith. Nothing really needs to be said about Aerosmith. Apart from: you may recall reading a few weeks ago about my feedback den. I'm not saying Joe Perry is copping my style but you can decide for yourselves:

And then like elderly cripples we walked blistered and enthused back to the car.

SEMI-OBLIGATORY GREAT MEN PLUG: Mental Benn is still plotting our metamorphosis into the next Kylie Minogue, but until then go ahead and have a listen to our demo of Staymaker.